The Role of Communication Within an Active and Healthy Sex Life
Couples who have been together for prolonged periods of time will inevitably succumb to the same basic pattern: an initially intense period of physical and emotional intimacy whereby the libidos of the partners are equally matched; followed by a seemingly inevitable decline in their time for one another. This is oftentimes as a direct consequence of the various demands and pressures that married life can bring, such as children, financial concerns and job security fears.
However, it is also important to appreciate that one of the biggest challenges that couples face with regards to the attaining and sustaining of a healthy sex life is the achievement of effective communication.
One of the best and most directly effective methods of achieving intimacy as well as revitalising a flagging sex drive is to discuss your sexual fantasies, wants and desires with your partner. Many people are extremely uneasy and apprehensive about doing this, worried that they maybe judged, stigmatised or rejected by their partner.
It is crucial that we appreciate this process from the positive perspective as well: namely, that the mere fact that you are willing to discuss your innermost thoughts and desires to another person requires a significant amount of trust and faith in the other person. This in turn will help to foster harmony and trust between partners, allowing them to feel more comfortable in each other’s presence.
Communication can also take the guise of actual directions during the lovemaking process. Again, this is an idea and concept that people are oftentimes deeply uncomfortable with, both in practise as well as in theory. One of the primary reasons for this is that they are worried that the mere fact that they are providing instructions and directions during the lovemaking process may compel their partner to assume that their sexual ability is in effect, less than competent.
However, it is important that we consider this issue more clearly, and from an objective perspective. A skilled and satisfying sexual partner is never born, they will instead learn and evolve their technique. In the same way, it is only through patient and loving guidance and teaching that a couple can hope to improve their relationship.
Another important and salient fact that is oftentimes overlooked by couples is the fact that by providing effective communication, the partners will be able to both give and receive a higher degree of pleasure. As the level of communication increases, so too will the trust, faith and intimacy that exists between both partners and that will then permeate and influence the other dynamics of the relationship.
Communication can also be used to affect and influence the sex life in another manner as well: by sending seductive and salacious texts, emails and letters to your partner, then you will be able to arouse their libido and hopefully achieve a mutually satisfactory lovemaking session.
Sometimes, sexual intercourse can be a source of discord and upset within the relationship, the reason for this is due to the fact that there is a mismatch between the libido of the partners and so one partner feels under pressure to perform sexual services. By utilising good communication, it will be far easier for both parties to express their wishes and be more assertive without eliciting bad feeling.
